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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25657537">With the heart, not the eyes</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarsAboveStarsBelow/pseuds/StarsAboveStarsBelow'>StarsAboveStarsBelow</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>SEVENTEEN (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Blind Character, Bottom Hong Jisoo | Joshua, Drinking, Eventual Smut, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Jeonghan is the best, Joshua is blind, Joshua is precious, Light Angst, M/M, Only a tiny bit of angst, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Smut, Smut isn't until chapter 4, Strangers to Friends, Strangers to Lovers, The rating will change then, Top Yoon Jeonghan, Yoon Jeonghan is Whipped, slight mention of mental illness and bullying, so kind</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 02:42:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>5,426</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25657537</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarsAboveStarsBelow/pseuds/StarsAboveStarsBelow</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Joshua is blind and Jeonghan shows him (how beautiful) the world (can be).</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hong Jisoo | Joshua &amp; Yoon Jeonghan, Hong Jisoo | Joshua/Yoon Jeonghan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>75</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Chapter 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Joshua is blind and Jeonghan shows him (how beautiful) the world (can be).</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Note:<br/>a white stick is used for scanning the surroundings.<br/>Some blind people keep their eyes open, others closed. Joshua’s eyes start closed.<br/>Joshua’s other senses are heightened</p><p> </p><p>I did some research and was inspired a bit by a Hong Kong drama. If there’s any inaccuracies I truly apologize. And this is purely fiction.</p><p>I didn't want to post anything until I pre-wrote everything but I feel the need to add to the jihan/yoonhong tag..</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>“It’s the first week of the semester. What reason could you possibly have for wanting to go to the library right now? At this hour?” Jun asks. “Come on Joshua. You’re young. You’re beautiful. A guy like you deserves to go out on a night like this. You’ve been cooped up in your dorm all week studying. How or why you do it, I don’t know.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua fakes a cough. “Some people are more studious than others. I happen to be the responsible one. You, on the other hand, are the farthest from the words ‘studious’ and ‘responsible.’”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Haha very funny. I’m serious, Joshua. You’re graduating this year and all you’ve done for the past 3 years is study. It’s time for you to make new friends. Fall in love. Get drunk. Make mistakes,” Jun says. He leans off the door frame of Joshua’s room and walks toward the closet. “By midnight I want you on the dance floor being swept away by some Prince Charming.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua is exasperated. He hates going out. Not because he hates the idea of company, but because he’s blind. His life is hard enough as it is, he doesn’t need to be a burden to everyone around him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Jun, please don’t make me,” Joshua just sighs. He tries to muster up all the sadness in his voice and even adds a small pout hoping Jun would feel bad and give in.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That won’t work on me this time, Shua. Please? One night is all I ask. If it goes horribly wrong, I’ll never ask you or question you ever again. Okay?” Jun can see Joshua start to give up.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua tries his best to not slip out a groan of annoyance but to no avail. “Promise?” Joshua asks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Have I ever lied to you?” Jun retorts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh absolutely. But if something happens to me, I will not hesitate to castrate you while you sleep,” Joshua threatens.</span>
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jun parks on the side of the block. Joshua can hear the club music from the car. Another reason he hates going out is because his remaining 4 senses fail him. He depends on them to find his way around and to get a sense of the people around him and his environment, but at social gatherings, they’re close to useless.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jun comes around and opens the door for him. Joshua hesitantly gets out along with his white stick. In all honesty, there’s nothing that embarrasses Joshua more than showing up to a club with sunglasses for his eyes and a white stick. Years of bullying made him so self conscious about being blind.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m sure more than half of the people there are dead drunk anyway. Don’t care what they think, you look hot.” Jun comforts him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t feel hot. I don’t even know why you dressed me this way,” Joshua complains, tugging at the red string around his neck.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Don’t mess it up, Shua! I spent a long time making your outfit perfect,” Jun whines as he tries to adjust Joshua’s choker. “Your black pants hug your legs wonderfully and the V in your black silk shirt will surely make someone fall in love with you…r chest.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks for the encouragement Jun but I don’t want someone to love me for my body…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ughhhh I didn’t mean it that way. Nevermind, let’s go find you a Prince Charming.” Jun leads Joshua to the front door.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua can already feel the heat in the air. There’s way too many different smells and he practically feels like he’s walking through the smoke. It’s all too hot and all too loud. As Jun leads him through the room, he feels too many bodies pressed up against his.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Not long after, Jun leads him to a booth in the corner of the club. Joshua sighs in relief as he sits. He hears Jun talking and then realizes some of their other friends came to.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hi Shua!” Minghao yells.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua smiles and waves in the general direction he hears his friend yell from. His friend’s voice is distinctly rough with a slight foreign tongue.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Minghao sits next to Jun and gives him a kiss on the cheek. “Missed me?” He teases.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You? Always,” Jun replies with a kiss of his own.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh goodness, get a room,” Joshua hears someone else say. It’s Wonwoo, he can tell by the deep and rich register in his voice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Wonwoo, I’m surprised you’re here. You hate these things as much as me,” Joshua says as Wonwoo moves to sit beside him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Jun practically begged me to come,” he replies swiftly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ah I see. Jun, care to tell the group why? Is it so Wonwoo will keep me company while<em> you</em> sweep Minghao off his feet?” Joshua scoffs, catching Jun.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“.. um nononononono.. that’s not why. The more the merrier right?” Jun replies nervously, still hugging Minghao close.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Ugh it’s fine. Go have fun, kids. I’ll be okay,” Joshua reaches for a beer. “Just me and my beer.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Joshua, are you sure? I promise we were actually planning on staying with you the whole night.” Jun tries to comfort Joshua.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know how much you and Minghao like to dance, go have fun and come back when you’re tired. You too Wonwoo, I could’ve sworn I heard Mingyu’s voice.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Wonwoo laughs sheepishly. He did in fact invite Mingyu.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Go go, I don’t want to impose on you guys,” Joshua says as he pushes them off the booth, leaving no room for argument.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>And finally Joshua is alone. He knew he shouldn’t have come. He’s just a burden to his friends. It’s not that he’s not independent. He can cook, he can clean. He is very capable of walking with his own two feet. But it can be daunting crossing the street, using public transportation, or walking when it’s dark and no one else is with him. His already dark world becomes even darker. He hates going out because he hates being a burden to society. His friends are kind enough to take care of him but all the trouble he causes is not worth it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey,” someone says as Joshua gets taken out of his train of thought.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua didn’t recognize the voice. It was soft and a bit higher in pitch, but rough around the edges. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hello, do I know you?” Joshua asks, sipping his beer.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It would be weird if you knew me but I didn’t know you, wouldn’t it?” The other teases, mischief clear in his voice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry but I’m not someone you’d look for. I’m blind.” Joshua replies with a tinge of annoyance.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s nice, I’m Jeonghan. Nice to meet you, blind,” the guy, Jeonghan, says nonchalantly.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua feels Jeonghan reaching to hold his hand, shaking it. Joshua flinches at first, but let’s him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Now, what’s your real name?” he asks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua wonders why this guy is still here but decides to play along anyway. “Joshua.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And why Joshua, would a guy like you sit here by himself when there’s a whole new meaning of living right in front of you?” Jeonghan asks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You mean too hot bodies pressed against each other and inhalation of god knows what? No thanks I’ll pass.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jeonghan sighs, “Can I sit?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua nods and motions for him to come closer.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You must be fun at parties. Are you not enjoying yourself because you’re blind?” Jeonghan says.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes Jeonghan, it’s because I’m blind. I don’t belong here.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t see why that should stop you. If you don’t believe you belong out there, living the college life, showing yourself to the world, then I don’t either.</span>
</p><p>
  <span>“Can I offer to buy you a drink? They’re better than all the glass bottles, I promise.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thanks for the offer, but no thanks. Can’t be too careful. I only have bottled drinks when I’m out,” Joshua replies as he finishes his first drink.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why?” Jeonghan asks, curious.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What if someone spiked it?” Joshua retorts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Do you trust me?” Jeonghan asks as he reaches for Joshua’s hand and tugs him up. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t think I should,” <em>but why do I?</em> that last part he doesn’t say out loud.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Let’s go to the bar. I want to show you something. Trust me.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>If a stranger is telling me to trust him, I really shouldn’t. but he follows anyway.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua has no idea what he’s doing but he is quite the lightweight so it must be the alcohol talking. If his mom or friends see him now, they’d die of shock. Joshua gets up with the white stick until he feels Jeonghan pulling it out of his grasp.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Leave it here, trust me, okay?” Jeonghan folds it up and places it on the chair.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jeonghan’s hand is in Joshua’s the whole time and he leads him to the bar. It’s a little quieter, but not by much. Jeonghan sits him on one of the stools and then sits himself on the one next to it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Excuse me,” Jeonghan calls, “can I get the Carat Special? Thank you. Do you like sweet things, Joshua?’</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I do,” Joshua replies simply, “Why?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jeonghan doesn’t get a chance to answer because the bartender comes back with a drink in hand. Jeonghan sips it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Here, try it. It’s my favorite,” Jeonghan places the glass in Joshua’s hand.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Didn’t you hear what I said? I don’t drink--” Joshua starts.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I know I know. I drank half of it already. If you die, I die. Here, I’ll drink it again.” Jeonghan guides the glass that is still in Joshua’s hand, and drinks from it.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua doesn’t know why, but he trusts the other completely. He’s never even accepted his friends’ offers but here he is about to drink a stranger’s concoction. What an enigma.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He tilts the glass and drinks. His mouth is hit with a million flavors. They swirl around and for a second, it seems like colors are swimming in his mouth. He turns toward Jeonghan.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It’s good, right?” Jeonghan asks, Joshua hears a smile in his voice. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua nods, “What is it?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Honestly, I don't know,” Jeonghan laughs. “But it’s the first mixed, alcoholic drink I had and I want it to be yours too.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Wow, thanks. Really. For agreeing to die with me and for the drink.” Joshua jokes then takes another sip.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Anytime,” Jeonghan replies. A hint of fondness is evident in his voice, but Joshua fails to catch it. “Anyways, where’s your friends?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I told them to go have fun without me, I don’t mind being alone.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well now I’m here. Don’t be alone. Life’s too short for that,” Jeonghan orders another drink for himself. “So tell me about yourself, Joshua. I just agreed to die with you, I’d like to know who I’m dying for.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>He shrugs. “I’m an extremely boring person,” Joshua starts, “I became blind when I was 6--”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Before Joshua could finish his sentence, Jeonghan cut him off. “No, not that story. <em>Your</em> story. Who you are. Your disability doesn’t make you who you are as a person. I want to know your favorite food. Favorite movie. Favorite pastime. Your major.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh the deep questions I see..” Joshua smiles. “Hmm.. Pasta, <em>Me Before You,</em> playing the guitar, and Psychology. You?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Pasta, Avengers, sleeping, and Art.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I promise to make you pasta someday. My friends say mine is the best there is,” Joshua laughs. “You don’t seem like an art person but what do I know? Why art?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You’re right. A lot of people are surprised. I come from a doctor family so you can imagine the disappointment.” Though the content of Jeonghan’s words seem melancholy, there’s not a trace of sadness in his voice. “You know the saying ‘a picture is worth a thousand words?’” Jeonghan asks.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua hums.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Art is how I express myself. I’m not the best with words but give me a piece of paper and a pencil and I’ll tell you a story and so much more. Of course it would be nice to save people, but I don’t think I was ever meant to be the hero that my parents are. I can’t cure cancer, but I <em>can</em> make someone smile when they recover,” Jeonghan answers. “Why psychology?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua can’t help but smile himself with the thought of Jeonghan showing patients his art. “That’s.. really beautiful.” Joshua thinks for a second, playing with the rim of his empty glass, “Within the first seven seconds of meeting someone, you will already have a solid impression of them. Now that’s almost entirely based on appearance. But I can’t do that. The only thing I can do is lend an ear. Whether they want to tell me all the good or all the bad about themselves is entirely up to them. If they want to tell me their life story or if they want to never speak about themselves. That’s why I chose psychology. Because I’m blind, there’s no way for me to ever discriminate against someone. It’s just me and their voice,” Joshua explains.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You are indeed the softie that I imagined,” Jeonghan chuckles. “I think that’s beautiful too, you know. The world needs more people like you.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hey Joshua, who’s this?” Joshua hear’s Jun as he walks closer.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“This is Jeonghan, my..” Joshua’s not sure what they are yet.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Friend. I’m Joshua’s friend,” Jeonghan finishes for Joshua.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Jun seems wary, but says his greetings anyway.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well it was nice talking to you, Joshua. Let’s do it again some time. Nice to meet your other friends too. See you soon,” Jeonghan gets up to leave.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh and Joshua, as I said, the world needs more people like you. Get out there, you deserve to be seen and heard,” Jeonghan leaves just as fast as he came.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Who was that, Shua?” Wonwoo asks, slightly worried.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“That’s Yoon Jeonghan. You guys don’t know him?” Minghao asked, walking up to Jun. Jun and Wonwoo shake their heads. “How? He’s the most popular guy on campus. He’s a senior like Joshua. Surprised you don’t know him. How about you, Joshua? I didn’t know you were friends with him.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I just met him today. He bought me a drink and we talked a little,” he replies.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Did he cause you any trouble? I don’t trust guys like him,” Jun hands Joshua back his white stick as they move to leave the club.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“No, he was really friendly actually,” Joshua says with a small smile on his face.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hmm that’s good then, at least you seem happy. So… Did you have fun?” Jun asks, with hope filled in his voice. “Do you wanna go out next week?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Joshua thinks for a few minutes. The only thing on his mind right now is Yoon Jeonghan. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Maybe,” Joshua replies simply. Maybe only for Jeonghan.</span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This is a four part story! Woah! I usually only write one shots :) The other chapters are a lot more intimate and better reads.</p><p>This first chapter killed me, I’m bad at setting the scene. There’s so much dialogue!!!!! I hate dialogue oh my god! I hope it was clear who was saying what and I hope it didn’t drag on too long.. sorry if it did. </p><p>I actually wrote this first chapter 3 times. Yeah. And all 3 times it was at least 2000 words each so... I wasted so much time.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Chapter 2</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Joshua sees the sunset.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This chapter isn't that great. Keep in mind dialogue is not my best friend... and I didn't proof read</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Joshua can’t help but relive his encounter with Jeonghan. The way that he made Joshua feel so comfortable. Never questioning his disability or making it the main topic. Treating him as an equal, even encouraging him. It was short and brief, almost as if it didn’t happen, but there’s no denying that Joshua felt a warmth blossom in his chest while he talked to the other.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>A few weeks later, Joshua notices Jun getting ready in his room.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Hey Jun, are you going out again tonight?” Joshua asks.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jun turned to him as he fixed his hair. “Yeah. Oh. Do you want to come too?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua hesitates at first. <em>Does he want to go out again? Is it too obvious he wants to talk to Jeonghan? What if that was a one time thing? What if Jeonghan’s not even there.</em></p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I can see the cogs turning in your head. He may be there, he may not be. But you’ll never know unless you try,” Jun tells Joshua.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Come on, I’ll help you get ready.” Jun walks to Joshua’s room and starts looking through his closet as Joshua follows.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua gives in and dresses in whatever Jun picked out. He’s nervous but kind of excited at the same time. Tonight he’s wearing a burgundy, flowy shirt with black jeans. Jun can’t help but put another choker on him. This time it’s thin and black with a small pendant. Joshua questions why and Jun replies with “chokers are made for your long neck.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua doesn’t argue.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They leave the apartment at around 9 PM, the night still young. Joshua’s heart is almost beating out of his chest. He’s scared that Jeonghan won’t be there but he’s also scared he will be. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They walk into the club and go towards the same booth as last time. Just as he moves to sit, someone comes up behind him and whispers in his ear, “Missed me?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It’s Jeonghan.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua notices Jun talking to Jeonghan but doesn’t catch most of it, drowned out by the blasting music. All he heard was, “take care of him, I trust you.” Jun moves to leave them alone. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You didn’t answer me. Did you miss me?” Jeonghan asks again, this time not tickling his ear.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No…” Joshua trails off. <em>Liar </em>Joshua thinks.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Liar. You did or else you wouldn’t be back,” Jeonghan chuckles. He grabs Joshua’s hand and just like last time, he takes Joshua’s white stick and places it on the chair.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Do you trust me?” Jeonghan asks once again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes,” Joshua breaths out confidently with no hint of hesitation.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They arrive at the bar, the same seats as last time.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What would you like to drink? No bottles, try something new,” Jeonghan asks Joshua.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I don’t know that much about mixed drinks. Surprise me.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Two Diamond drinks please,” Jeonghan tells the bartender.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua doesn’t really know how to lead the conversation but thank goodness Jeonghan can.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“So, I thought this wasn’t your thing. Why are you back,” Jeonghan asks. There’s no mockery or annoyance in his voice, just sincere curiosity.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I think you know why,” Joshua laughs, “Don’t say it out loud,” he adds.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why? Embarrassed? You came back for me, right?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua doesn’t answer.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The drinks come and Jeonghan places one in Joshua’s hand. He leads Joshua’s hand to his mouth and drinks.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“There, I took a sip of yours. We die together, right?” Jeonghan smiles.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Before Joshua drinks his own, he asks Jeonghan, “Can I sip yours? You know, in case yours is spiked…” Joshua trails off, heat threatening to rise on his cheeks.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeonghan laughs, “of course.” He puts his glass to Joshua’s mouth and tilts back. The liquid rushes through Joshua’s mouth and this time it’s fruitier with a strong strawberry flavor, but just as sweet.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You really know your drinks Jeonghan,” Joshua says as he proceeds to drink his own.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’ll take that as a compliment,” Jeonghan smiles.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“As I was saying, I can confidently say that I came back tonight for <em>you.</em> Life’s too short to not take risks. You Joshua, you’re a risk. Not for the reasons you think of, but because I think you’re an enigma waiting for me to break.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m the enigma? I think you are. I don’t really get you. You show up suddenly, the <em>one</em> day I decide to go out and our 15 minute conversation made me reevaluate my life and…” Joshua trails off, not wanting to finish.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“And what?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“And feel things,” Joshua admitted. The blush is definitely evident on his face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“What kind of things?” Jeonghan smirked.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Let’s not talk about it. You’re just different,” Joshua tried to turn away from the other, but not before Jeonghan brought his hand up to Joshua’s cheek to turn him.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua’s now facing Jeonghan, eyes still closed and covered by his sunglasses. Jeonghan’s hand is still lingering before he pulls away. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeonghan decides not to push. “Okay then, what do you want to talk about?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“You asked me some deep questions last time, remember? Favorite movie, food. What’s your favorite color?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Since Jeonghan is an art major, color must surround him. Joshua loves the idea of color. The splatter of bright yellow against a black background, light emitting the canvas. Or the contrast of a dark, rich purple blended into a blue. The colors he envisions in his head, but those dreams sadly never become reality. So yes, color interests him, more than it does anything else.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“This is hard…” Jeonghan ponders. “I love every color equally.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“But if you could only paint with one color for the rest of your life, what would it be?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I guess.. black.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Black is not a color,” Joshua retorts seriously. “It is and will never be a color.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why is that?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Black is the absence of all color. It’s just nothingness. Nothing there to give it a spark of life.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“To you it is nothingness, but to me it’s everything. It’s the first pigment used by artists in prehistory and the first ink used by book printers. Sure it can be linked to death, mourning, and darkness, but it can also symbolize elegance, wealth, restraint, and power. Therefore, black is my favorite color. I’m not saying this to mock you, but not everything is black and white. You can’t have light without darkness. The light brings in the color that you can’t see at first glance. That’s why black is so important,” Jeonghan answers.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thanks for the art lesson,” Joshua replies. He’s not entirely convinced on the whole “black is good” thing considering his entire world is black, thus he greatly despises it, but he sees it in a new perspective now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I would ask for your favorite color, but I’m not sure how you know what color is?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua explains, “Oh. I do know color. I became blind when I was 6 so I know how most things look like. My favorite color is orange. A rich, bright orange.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Like.. the fruit?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“No silly.. more than just the fruit. I remember when I was little, I went on a family vacation to Hawaii and each evening, I would sit on the beach and watch the sunset. There were so many colors but orange was the most distinct. It was bright and rich. Beautiful. And as the sun would disappear from the horizon, orange would be the color that stayed for a few seconds more,” Joshua smiles as he envisions the orange gold stretched far and wide. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I wish I could see it one last time. The sunset,” Joshua sighs. He’s suddenly melancholy thinking of those times when seeing your last sunset wasn’t a problem.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeonghan thinks for a moment, both of them quiet. “Joshua, do you trust me?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why do you always ask me that?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Because I want to know if you trust me or not. I don’t want to force you, I want you to decide for yourself. If you trust me great. If you don’t, I won’t push.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua finds it endearing. “Yes Jeonghan, I trust you.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeonghan smiles and gets up to leave. “Great! Let’s go!” He guides Joshua off the chair and towards the exit not before stopping by Joshua’s friends telling them they’re going somewhere and he’ll drop Joshua off at home later.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Where are you taking him?” Jun screams to Jeonghan over the booming of the music.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeonghan says something in Jun’s ear but Joshua doesn’t catch it. Jun nods and let’s them go.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When they’re finally outside, Jeonghan’s hand is still covering Joshua’s. Joshua stops Jeonghan before they could move. “Why so secretive? Where are you taking me?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s something good I promise. Trust me. Do you still want to go?” Jeonghan asks.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua ponders for a moment weighing the pros and cons before nodding back a yes. “Do I need my white stick?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Of course not. You have me!” Jeonghan loops Joshua’s arm with his and walks them toward campus. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They walk in comfortable silence until Joshua can’t help but ask again. “You didn’t answer me, where are we going? Can’t I get a hint?” Joshua pleads.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I want to help you see,” Jeonghan replies simply. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Before Joshua got the chance to question Jeonghan on what he means by that, they arrived at a building. Jeonghan uses a card key to open the large, glass door, ushering Joshua inside. Joshua’s sure he’s never been here before because of the slight scent of paint like an art classroom. They must be in the art department.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeonghan goes to turn on a few light switches before leading him to a bench. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“This is the art department's art gallery. A few of our works are displayed here. It’s a large, brightly lit, beige room with benches in front of each piece. The artwork is lined up against the wall. Right now we’re sitting in front of my section,” Jeonghan explains. Jeonghan researched that he should always try to explain the environment or other things thoroughly to a blind person so he wanted to give Joshua a sense of the room he was in.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Why are we here?” Joshua asks. He would love nothing more than to see the art but it feels as if he’s being mocked because he can’t see a thing.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Before you come to conclusions, let me explain. A few weeks ago I did a painting,” he pauses.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Of an orange sunset. I use thickened acrylic paint so there’s lots of textures on the canvas. I was hoping to help you see the painting by touch and me explaining it,” Jeonghan waits for Joshua to reply. He hopes he didn’t overstep but he has a feeling this will work.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Isn’t that difficult? How could this work? Seems complicated.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeonghan’s glad Joshua has a bit of interest. “That’s why we start off small. A very simple painting like a fruit or a person. Are you up to it? It’s completely okay if you think I’m overstepping.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua is kind of surprised. No one has ever done this for him and he does want to “see” Jeonghan’s art. But he’s also scared for the disappointment. Yes his senses are heightened, yes he reads braille, but that doesn’t mean he can see a painting. At the same time, he also hears Jeonghan’s voice telling him to take risks, life’s too short not to. He knows that by now, he does trust Jeonghan, more than he should. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua nods his head once, “let’s do it.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Jeonghan stands Joshua up and walks him closer to the first painting. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Here’s the first one, are you ready?” Jeonghan asks.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When Joshua nods, Jeonghan takes his hand and places it at the edge of the canvas. As he explains the painting, he guides Joshua’s hand along every bump and crevice.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“This is the stem of the apple. It’s a very dark brown, close to black color. I wanted to focus on the actual apple part. Here is the outline of the apple. I only painted the top half to get a close up of it. It’s a very bright green. The greenest Apple I’ve ever seen. Almost like a perfect grassy lawn kind of green. And on the apple are water droplets here.” Jeonghan used Joshua’s finger to glide over each droplet. “There’s probably 20 or even 30 water droplets. The main focus wasn’t really the apple. It was the water.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua felt everything. Joshua saw everything. Is what like he could actually picture the painting in his mind. His sense of touch was extremely heightened now. He imagined the bright green and the crisp water hanging off the apple.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I can… see it,” Joshua’s voice barely above a whisper. “I can see it,” he repeats.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>It’s quiet but neither mind. Joshua revels in the thought of seeing a painting, for the first time in too many years. Jeonghan revels in Joshua’s wide smile on his face. That shy, unsure smile is no more. Instead, it’s replaced with genuine happiness and curiosity. A fond smile dances upon Jeonghan’s lips as well.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After a moment, Jeonghan asks, “ready for the next one?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua nods and they take a few steps to the right. Once again, Jeonghan takes Joshua’s fingertips and places them on the painting.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“This is one of my favorites. The sky is a medium blue. Not too dark, not too light. Like when the sun has just slipped beneath the horizon and everything starts to darken. Even though the sun has just set, the moon is big and full.” Jeonghan circles Joshua’s fingers around the circular shape. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s a dark yellow, not white. Kind of like cheddar cheese. Here’s the tree. It’s completely black because it’s a silhouette. There’s no leaves. On the branch of the tree, right here, is a swing. It’s also black but I like to imagine an old, rope swing. On the swing is a girl. You can’t see the details but she’s wearing a dress and staring at the moon. She sits on her side and her hair flows in the wind.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Just as Jeonghan finishes tracing the hair of the girl, He lets go and allows Joshua to roam free. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“It’s beautiful. Is the sky different shades of blues? Is that why I feel so many bumps?” Joshua questions as he smooths over the large space on the canvas once again.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Yes, here’s a darker blue, here’s some lighter blues. Down here are some very pale blues, almost white, as the clouds.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Again, it’s quiet, as if Joshua is trying his hardest to see the painting in front of him. In both of their minds, Joshua <em>does</em> see it. He sees the swirling of the blues. He sees the cheddar cheese moon. He sees the girl.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I see it,” Joshua repeats. ”It makes me feel at peace. Like you just want to be in a daze too and just stare at the moon.” </p>
<p>“Here’s the last one. Are you ready to see the sunset?” Jeonghan asks before lifting Joshua’s hands one last time.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Absolutely.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“The main color is orange, of course. This is the sky. The darker shades are near the top and it slowly blends into a bright orange then in the middle it’s a brilliant yellow, like gold. This is where the sun peeks over the horizon. The horizon is the water. I made the sea here. You can feel all the waves right? I used lots of layering to make the waves. Whites, blues, but also orange so that it reflects the sky. Can you see it?” Jeonghan hopes he did the painting justice. He hopes just for a second, that it brings Joshua back to the past of seeing the sun set on the beach.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“My favorite moment in time is when the sky goes from pink to purple to orange to gold, and for a brief moment, everything appears heavenly. And right now, I imagine that heaven. I feel like I can hear the waves. I can feel the wind flow through my hair and the sun kiss my skin. I can see the sunset.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua turns to Jeonghan and hesitantly wraps his arms around his waist. Jeonghan’s surprised as he stiffens but slowly melts into it and brings his own arms up to Joshua’s shoulders.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thank you,” Joshua breaths into Jeonghan’s shoulder.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Though they only met a few weeks ago, there’s no doubt in Joshua’s mind that Jeonghan is special. Different. He doesn’t believe that anyone in a million years would’ve ever taken steps to make Joshua’s small, insignificant wish come true. Something as simple as seeing the sunset proves to be a great challenge for Joshua but Jeonghan helped him overcome that. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Anytime,” Jeonghan whispers back. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>They release their holds on each other, Joshua’s cheeks painted a light shade of red as he turns back towards the painting and looks down shyly. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Ready to go?” Jeonghan asks.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua nods and they make their way towards the dorms.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They walk in comfortable silence. It doesn’t bother them. They’re not close enough to strike up random conversations, but it’s not awkward as if they’re strangers. It’s like someday, he knows Jeonghan will play a part in his life, he just needs to take a confident step forward. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Joshua speaks up quietly, breaking the silence. “Can I get your number?” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Of course.” They exchange numbers as Jeonghan drops Joshua off in front of his building. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Thank you again Jeonghan. That was really something magical.” </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“I’m glad, don’t mention it,” Jeonghan smiles.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>They say their goodbyes and as Joshua retreats behind the closing door, Jeonghan turns to walk towards his own room.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Once Jeonghan is home, he immediately texts Joshua.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong>Jeonghan</strong>
</p>
<p>Home! Did you get in ok?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong>Joshua</strong>
</p>
<p>Yup! How about you?</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <strong>Jeonghan</strong>
</p>
<p>Safe and sound. I’ll see you soon, Shua. Good night ;)</p>
<p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Instead of a set amount of chapters, this will be longer than I thought so now it's "2 of ?"<br/>It's kind of slow right now but meh...<br/>Also, I finished 4/5ths of this chapter a while ago, but I didn't feel like doing that last part so the ending is kind of rushed. And of course, the dialogue in the middle is awkward af but I don't want to change it. </p>
<p>The next chapter will take a while since I haven't even started it yet. Hopefully it gets better ://</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
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